Is dating really that scary or are we simply over thinking it all the time?
Years ago you would hear so many successful dating stories, meeting down the local pub or whilst on holiday and having a flourishing holiday (and thereafter) romance!
It was rare you would hear of the bad experiences, were we just ashamed or was this real? Did we actually have so many great experiences with meeting people?
I was always wondering when thinking about it just how easy dating was years ago. Was it really that easy to meet someone out with friends and then spend the rest of your life together?
Couples would spend many years together and now i is rare I hear of someone lasting over 5 years.
Has our perceptions changed? I wonder often what really goes on in the dating world.
Long terms relationships (I am talking 10 years plus) are not as heard of these days and I wonder if the internet contributes to this.
With the ease of finding love online – do you really get to know someone just as much? So I thought I would start looking around the internet and see what I could find out.
The first thing I realised that there is many long relationship success stories out there that met online. Marriage, children, house. The whole nine yards.
Appearing like their life is happy.
I also saw that a lot of meets online were just one night stands, no strings fun and friendships with benefits.
Personally for me this was something that never interested me. I couldn’t be with someone sexually and have no feelings towards them. Also I did wonder often if I would get feelings down the line and these were not reciprocated.
Of course I then avoided this part of ‘dating’.
Although this was not for me – I know many people who are happy with no strings attached dating and prefer to live a life of having fun without the stress and troubles that comes with relationships.
Relationships aren’t easy, I understand. But are we quickly chucking in the towel without working past this?
Are we just thinking ‘Okay – this isn’t working, let’s separate’ and go their own ways?
Is the thought of spending the rest of our lives with one person so scary?
Do we watch too many films and TV shows showing the perfect marriage? The perfect relationship?
I feel on some level that media is to blame some how.
The reason I think this is the expectations we think we should be having with a relationship. Every day is a happy day full of love and joy.
Basing our live off Cinderella, finding the one that makes us constantly weak at the knees, intense feelings between us and every day is filled with even more love?
I have been in love, well I still am with my partner but it’s certainly nothing like what is portrayed in films.
It’s normal to argue. I mean how boring would life be if you agreed with everything?
Everything needs work, from your career, your self to your marriage/relationship. Nothing in life is easy otherwise it would be so boring.
If you think things are going stale, please consider working on it. Try new things together, go out and do something. Spend a night in bed together and do nothing other than enjoy each others company.
So what do we do these days to meet people? Well you can try adult dating sites, social media, through friends or going out and about (Pubs, clubs etc)
I met my partner on a night out funnily enough, we got talking after that and started a relationship and nearly 6 years later we are still together and happy with children.
My friend met her other half on a night out over 10 years ago now and still together, married with children.
Then another friend met her husband online and have been together 12 years I believe, married and children.
They all appear happy and seem to be in stable relationships.
Don’t get me wrong it’s not easy but it really is worth it in the long run. Spending your life with one person. Although I presume to some that seems very scary. Not being able to go elsewhere. Guess it comes to what you want and need.
You can be happy in life with one person. Just finding the person you are happy to spend the rest of your life with and work on your relationship too.
How did you meet and how long have you been together?
*This is a collaboration post.