From dating to practically married – just how did I do this?
Speaking to a friend that became recently divorced, they were asking how it was dating, asking for some advice and tips.
Now it had been a while since I had been dating, me and my partner have been together over 5 years now (Close to 6) and now we are practically married.
House, child, even a cat! Both of ours longest relationship and we have a very happy relationship together. Despite issues, fall backs and bad luck – we still remain together and very happy.
Before I found my partner, I had considered dating websites as I was getting nowhere the old fashioned way – going out and meeting someone.
I had started to feel quite lonely and couldn’t manage to get the courage to speak to someone face to face.
Even when I met my partner, I was so shy and barely said a word for the first day we met.
So off I went looking at different options for online dating. One option was match me happy
I got looking into the benefits of paid websites and how accurate they would be in matching me with someone alike.
Another option was choosing the free dating websites which I felt were more better for me and I wouldn’t feel like I wasted a load of money.
Off I went trying a few sites out to get a feel for it.
I did receive a few messages but after I responded to a couple I was asked to pay and I didn’t understand why. After a bit of looking on the internet I found out they were just some con charging £1.50 a message which wasn’t for me.
Right, I thought let’s try these apps people keep taking about. So I downloaded a few apps and they were more tailored to one night stands which again wasn’t for me.
Started to receive some very lewd messages and just deleted the profile right away. I couldn’t bare feeling so used and dirty.
I started to get frustrated.
I thought I might as well try these dating websites properly, make a few profiles and see how I got on.
I had some very strange messages and messages from men (maybe women?) pretending to be semi famous people – I presumed trying to catfish me or something.
It made me realise just how strange people can be and found the whole thing tiring and no one seemed to be a legitimate person.
One night I was out with friends and met my partner – I realised I never need any of these websites int eh end and just needed a little bit of confidence.
I know many who use the websites and find true happiness but I have also heard some horror stories at the same time.
Alas I got there in the end and I am now practically married, with a child and a house. Marriage is coming once we have finished furnishing the house how we want it.
Should I happen to be single again, I may decide to try online dating as it is much better now with a wider variety than previously. I think I could easily find someone but would need to ensure that I get to know someone before taking the plunge into meeting up.
A very rewarding thing is online dating, I know many who met their partner online and they are married with children in a stable, happy and healthy marriage. Me though? I tended to attract idiots or weirdos online.
But I won’t let the experiences get me down and always use this as a back up especially now I can’t really go out due to ill health.
Maybe, just maybe I will never need to think about going to dating sites as we seem pretty set together and happy. That is what is more important.
Would I recommend them to others? Of course – always be mindful though that not everyone is who they say they are or might be hiding some things.
I am quite worried about people online dating at times and I know I shouldn’t as not everyone is a strange person, con man or whatever you want to put there.
However there are people using dating websites to con people and make them think they are someone else or trying to extort money some how. We have all seen the horror shows on TV showing this happening.
Be wary and mindful, maybe ask specific questions so you know they are who they day they are. Google is also a good tool for looking up people.
Also checking social media as everyone has a social media account.
*This is a collaboration post